The cafeteria

When I first arrived at the UBCO cafeteria I was actually fairly excited! The first few days I ate burger after burger and sandwich after sandwich until I got absolutely sick of it! The constant "carvery" and the so called "specials" suddenly grew old but one thing that didn't grow old was my constant excitement to see the cafeteria workers. There was the "old guy" who was stubborn as hell and always cursing at how much he hated his work. The "greasy haired guy" who had the thick round glasses and did constant tricks with the tongs. One thing I remember about him was when I asked for a certain "special" and he replied with "you do know that's vegetarian?"....I quickly changed my order to an all beef patty burger. Over on the pasta side was what my buddy Phipps nicknamed "oddball", he also had glasses like the "greasy haired guy" but he was bald with a crazy scruffy beard. We'd walk through the door and "oddball" would be flipping one thing with one hand and shaking one thing with the other. Working the carts was the "serial killer" with a stare so devastating that it made people feel nervous.

Now,once moving on to the checkout line we would have three options. Option number one was that we could go to the "Robot" who would calculate how much your meal would cost before you even it got it..."that will be 8.99 please"..."that will be 2.99 please"..."that will be...."...you get the point...it was annoying as hell. Now, if you think that option #1 sucked, then option #2 isn't any better....at the checkout stand was what my friends and I called the "Tranny"...he/she would calculate your meal in a non annoying way but then when giving your card back would hold it between both hands and stare into your soul!!! the stare was creepy I must say.....I had countless discussions on whether this worker was a boy or a girl. My friend Landon deduced that it was a man because of its large adam apple and strong jawline....it was also hinted that it was a man from the name tag which read "Amanda" or how we read it " a-man-duh??". However, the long hair and the soft speaking sound of its voice made people think that it was a girl...who knows??...The last and final option was a tall middle aged fellow with a dark beard, long pony tailed hair and suit who we nicknamed "the terrorist". My friends and I always heard him talking about military guns and it was later confirmed when we creeped him on Facebook that he had written political propaganda on his notes.....it seems that today I would take the "Tranny" so i could try and find a clue as what gender it was........and this was just a regular cafeteria day...